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Kamala Harris and Doug Emhoff’s Relationship Timeline


Kamala Harris made history in the 2020 presidential election by becoming the first woman and the first person of color to be vice president of the United States. And her husband, Doug Emhoff, made history as well by becoming the nation’s first second gentleman.

He is not only the first man to hold the title of second gentleman. Emhoff is actually also the first Jewish spouse of a president or vice president in American history.

According to his official website, Emhoff was born in Brooklyn, New York, and raised in Matawan, New Jersey. His family — parents Mike and Barbara, along with siblings Jamie and Andy — moved to the Los Angeles area when Emhoff was a teen. He earned his undergraduate degree from California State University, Northridge and went on to earn a J.D. from University of Southern California Gould School of Law.

Following his law school graduation, Emhoff worked in entertainment law in the Los Angeles area for 30 years. It was in Los Angeles that he met the woman who would become his wife and the future first female vice president of the United States. Read on for a timeline of their love story.

2013: Emhoff and Harris meet

The two first met in 2013 on a blind date set up by a mutual friend, Chrisette Hudlin, whom Harris identified in her retelling of the story in her 2019 book, “The Truths We Hold.”

Her friend told her that she met a “cute” man who lives in Los Angeles that she thought was perfect for Harris.

“His name is Doug Emhoff, but promise me you won’t Google him. Don’t overthink it,” Harris recalled her friend telling her. “Just meet him. I already gave him your number. He’s going to reach out.”

(In a 2021 interview with CBS News, Harris would reveal that she had, in fact, Googled Emhoff before their date.)

Broad Museum Opening, Los Angeles, America - 17 Sep 2015
Then-California Attorney General Harris and Emhoff at an event in Los Angeles on Sept. 17, 2015.Chelsea Lauren/Variety / Penske Media via Getty Images

Harris said a few days later, Emhoff sent her an “awkward” text while he was at a basketball game with a friend and they briefly texted before making plans to connect on the phone the following day.

The next morning, Emhoff called Harris early, she wrote, and left a voicemail that was “long and a little rambling.”

“The voicemail, which I still have saved to this day, was long and a little rambling. He sounded like a nice guy, though, and I was intrigued to learn more,” she wrote. “Doug, on the other hand, was pretty sure that he had ruined his chances. The way he tells it, he thought his voicemail had been disastrous and that he’d likely never hear from me again. He had to restrain himself from calling again and leaving another long-winded message trying to explain away the first one.”

The two eventually talked on the phone later that day and the “conversation just flowed.” They made plans to get dinner in Los Angeles that Saturday.

“There was no pretense or posing with Doug, no arrogance or boasting,” Harris wrote of their first meeting. “He seemed so genuinely comfortable with himself. It’s part of why I liked him immediately.”

The morning after their first date, Harris says, Emhoff emailed her with all his available dates for the next few months.

“I’m too old to play games or hide the ball” Harris said Emhoff wrote in the email. “I really like you, and I want to see if we can make this work.”

2013: Harris meets Emhoff’s children, Cole and Ella

Emhoff was previously married to Kerstin Emhoff. After tying the knot in 1992, the then-couple welcomed two children, Cole and Ella, before divorcing in 2008.

The kids were named after named after John Coltrane and Ella Fitzgerald.

In a May 2019 piece for Elle, Harris opened up about wanting to take things slow when it came to meeting Emhoff’s children.

“As a child of divorce, I knew how hard it could be when your parents start to date other people,” she wrote. “And I was determined not to insert myself in their lives until Doug and I had established we were in this for the long haul.”

In her book, Harris said she and Emhoff waited “about two months” for her to meet the children after their first date, but in the end, the kids “could not have been more welcoming.”

“They are brilliant, talented, funny kids who have grown to be remarkable adults,” she said in the Elle essay. “I was already hooked on Doug, but I believe it was Cole and Ella who reeled me in.”

Vice Presidential Nominee Kamala Harris Addresses Virtual DNC From Delaware
Harris and Emhoff pose for a photo after Harris delivered her speech on the third night of the Democratic National Convention on Aug. 19, 2020. Win McNamee / Getty Images

2014: Emhoff proposes to Harris

In her book, Harris reveals that she was in the middle of a meltdown searching for a pair of missing pants when Emhoff proposed to her.

The two were about to leave on a romantic vacation to Italy together and she, feeling stressed, was searching for a pair of black pants when he arrived at her apartment before their departure. After agreeing to order takeout, Emhoff popped the question — and Harris says she didn’t immediately get it.

“I want to spend my life with you,” Harris recalled Emhoff telling her.

“That was sweet, but he was always sweet like that. Truth be told, I didn’t register the significance of what he’d said at all. I didn’t even look up. My mind was still on the black pants,” she wrote.

“‘No, I want to spend my life with you,’ he said again,” Harris recounted in her book. “When I looked up, he was getting down on one knee. He’d concocted an elaborate plan to propose to me in front of the Ponte Vecchio. But once he had the ring, it was burning a hole in his pocket. He couldn’t keep it secret.”

Harris wrote that she burst into tears — “not graceful Hollywood tears” — and said yes.

2014: Harris and Emhoff marry

Harris and Emhoff tied the knot on Aug. 22, 2014 in a small ceremony officiated by Harris’ younger sister, Maya.

The Emhoff children and Harris decided they didn’t want to call her “stepmom” so they agreed to use the name “Momala.”

2017: Harris becomes one of California’s senators

Harris and Emhoff spent more and more time in Washington, D.C. after Harris was elected to serve as one of California’s senators.

In January 2020, Emhoff began teaching law courses at the Georgetown University Law Center, according to his official White House bio.

2021: Harris sworn in as first female vice president and Emhoff becomes the first-ever second gentleman

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Harris and Emhoff arrive for the inauguration of Joe Biden as the 46th President of the United States in Washington, D.C. on Jan. 20, 2021.JONATHAN ERNST / POOL/AFP via Getty Images

On Jan. 20, 2021, Harris was sworn in as vice president on the steps of the U.S. Capitol, thus making Emhoff the second gentleman.

Causes he has chosen to advocate for in his role include access to legal aide for all, fighting anti-Semitism, abortion rights and more. 



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